catharsis
by thunder mark
Summary: drabbles. a world can't rebuild itself after all. -MaiZuko.
1. ghosts

**C A T H A R S I S**

a world can't rebuild itself after all.

{maiko}

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><p><strong>an: **mai is my favorite a:tla character. i love maiko. this is self-explanatory. this'll be a set of drabbles. i don't know how often i'll update, but i'll take requests and i'll write when i'm in the mood and we'll see where this goes. some will be long, some will be short. it just depends. all will have a prompt though. or a theme.

**drabble title: **ghosts

**word count: **208

**pairing: **MaiZuko

**prompt: "**they could hear whispers, but they took it in stride."

**disclaimer: **not even in my dreams...

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><p><em><strong>ghosts<strong>_

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Mai stood decorated before a riotous crowd, Zuko beside her. The throne lay behind them, underappreciated—they rarely sat. News was too exciting. Zuko would plop himself down on the ornate chair only to hop back up again when something troublesome or miraculous occurred. Naturally, Mai followed him as night follows day.

She frowned at the absurdity of it all.

Normally, the court was hauntingly empty, and the divine couple could hear the whispers of late dissenters, political opponents, and public enemies. They were the real ghosts of this place, even though Mai found an old stray hair of Ursa's under the seat cushion and Zuko wore Ozai's favored crown. Zuko told Mai of the people he watched burn to a crisp as a child. Azula saw more—Ursa usually covered Zuko's innocent eyes, and thus _she _became the disturbed one, locked away in a tower, begging screaming for her long-lost mother.

Now, the mob filled the space with complaints and threats and angry speeches. They wanted Zuko to make good on his word, to finally bring peace to the planet.

Zuko said he was trying. Mai said nothing.

The crowd was begging, realizing at once that their torches and flaming spirits were useless against Fire Nation royalty.

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	2. revelation

**C A T H A R S I S**

a world can't rebuild itself after all.

{maiko}

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><p><strong>an: **caffeine makes me hyper and aangsty. at the same time. it yields this sort of thing. short and not so sweet.

**drabble title: **revelation

**word count: **168

**pairing: **MaiZuko

**prompt: "**only _you_ decide their place."

**disclaimer: **what a_ twisted_ world that would be.

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><p><strong><em>revelation.<em>**

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Mai leaned against a wall in their back room. Her face was so apathetic she almost broke a sweat.

Zuko was pacing and pleading.

"I don't know what to do anymore! I make one damned decision and they're all over me like a pack of angry komodo dragons! I—I just can't help it. I satisfy one group by neglecting another. And neither ends up happy. I can't—I can't help anyone! The Avatar's trying…I'm trying. People still _suffer_! Maybe I'm not too dissimilar from the rest—Azulon, Sozin, Dad…"

"He's not your dad," Mai said in a dull voice.

"Huh?"

"He's your father, but he's not your dad."

Zuko stopped, contemplating this. In its own strange, strange way, it made perfect sense.

Tears weren't welling in his eyes, his throat wasn't tightening, and he didn't blurt out, "But my mother _is_ my mom!"

He should have. But he kept his mouth shut and his dignity spotless where people could see him.

Mai found this _extremely_ boring.

.


	3. like child's play

**C A T H A R S I S**

a world can't rebuild itself after all.

{maiko}

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><p><strong>an: **i really need to write something longer, don't i? or is it writer's natural instinct to automatically think their work is shit?

that said, i hope you enjoy my drabble-set. heh.

**drabble title: **like child's play

**word count: **356

**pairing: **MaiZuko

**prompt: "**'simplicity,' she said, 'is hard to find in a world so complex. we need to break it down.'"

**disclaimer: **_if only_.

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><p><strong><em>like child's play<em>**

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Mai knew of a place behind the walls that they could go when tempers flared and scars shone like diamonds. She'd traveled there once or twice when she was younger and healthier, or when Azula had childishly and temporarily banished her.

It smelled like a heaven of apples, but Mai imagined the fruit rotting and plopping to the ground and spilling its guts for the world to see and attracting unruly insects.

Zuko met her, and it was child's play—wasting away, dawdling, speaking of the better times before exile was thrust upon him, and before the world demanded he change it for the better. He was only one man. Mai dutifully agreed, swallowing a blunt remark the way a sword-swallower takes his dull knives. Manfully. With a grain of salt.

And now Zuko rested his head against her shoulder in the shade of the spreading apple tree. He sighed—he filled the courtyard with sighs and broken dreams. His ideals were routinely shattered by realists. They said an era of peace so soon would be unheard of. The world revolved in cycles, and now it dabbled in discord.

So it goes.

He said, "Mai. Remember when times were simple?"

"Your sister was still a psychopath," Mai replied, evenly. "And the world in ruins. In a way, it's simpler now."

"Simple for us, I mean," Zuko clarified.

"I suppose I understand what you mean. Still, I had Azula, and _you_ had Azula. She was hardly pleasant. I wouldn't call things simple."

Zuko mused on this, hesitating a moment. "Our wedding night was simple."

Mai's smile was small, but noticeable. So was her flush. "Of course…"

Zuko raised his head. Mai noted—with a hint of dread—that he too began to smell like apples. The scent would haunt her nightmares, filled with the adjacent memories of blue fire, taunts, and crackling lightning. She felt nauseous all of a sudden. The world flattened. Color dimmed.

"War is absurd," Zuko said. He separated completely from Mai, instead leaning against the base of the spreading apple tree.

"No kidding," she retorted, her stomach feeling like rubber to be burnt.

.


	4. tethered

**C A T H A R S I S**

a world can't rebuild itself after all.

{maiko}

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><p><strong>an: **thanks for the reviews. er. if you don't understand it yet, that's okay. i don't either most of the time.

**drabble title: **tethered

**word count: **582

**pairing: **MaiZuko

**prompt: "**drifting away like a balloon..."

**disclaimer: **that's hilarious, how you think i might own it.

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><p><strong><em>tethered<em>**

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In Zuko's world, robes were scratchy and girls were mysterious.

Servants popped in at all the wrong times: when he went to sleep, when he tried to focus on his work, when he wanted to be alone with his wife. They bowed and muttered quick apologies. Zuko felt a little sympathetic; they weren't telepathic, after all, how were they supposed to follow orders and know what he was up to simultaneously? They didn't buy their way into lower class life, begging to serve him in front of the One, Agni. Still, everything seemed to collapse on him. He could barely breathe.

They would catch him at the wrong times, when he was easing slowly away from crushing reality, and pull him right back like a lifeline. One time, that was all he desired, one time to simply float away.

He told this to Mai. Of course, she thought it was stupid.

"You don't always have to look for meaning," she snapped. She had woken up on the wrong side of the bed mere moments before, and now she stood across the room, a sour expression coating her complexion like thick paste. She wore a thin nightgown, one Zuko had picked out for her. The material rippled in the breeze from the open window next to her. Zuko stared.

Mai added, "Life is tedious. Get used to it."

Zuko continued to gawk, so easily distracted. Mai had become accustomed to this, ever since the hormones kicked in. Didn't make it any less annoying, though. Every time, she considered pinning him to the wall with a toss of her knives, and every time she came _this close_ to actually doing just that.

"What's the point of that?" Zuko asked, after a time. He blinked, furrowing his brow.

Mai groaned. "Do I look like a spirit to you? I don't have all the answers."

Zuko didn't reply, ambling over to Mai's vanity and adjusting his crown carefully to the tune of his reflection in the mirror. He lit a candle with a flick of his pointer finger.

"You never wear your crown," Zuko pointed out, turning back to his wife.

She shrugged. "Topknots give me headaches. I let my hair down."

"That's refreshing."

"Not really."

He smiled at her. Mai glared, arms folded across her chest in a sort of makeshift barrier against the world. She leaned on her left hip. She cocked an eyebrow. Zuko laughed.

"What?" she moaned.

"I love mornings."

"I hate_ everything_."

"Me as well?"

"Most of the time."

Zuko grabbed her crown from off the counter of the vanity and extinguished the candle. Its last light, traveling at ungodly speeds, faded from the metallic snare and wasted away into nonexistence. Mai's attention was slipping, _semi-somna_.

"You're beautiful, Fire Lady. And you don't need to prove it to anyone."

She didn't retort, allowing him to comment and be merry. He tucked the crown into her hand, and the jagged points dug into her palm without drawing blood. Her palm protested, believing only knives were worth the metal to create.

And she didn't feel beautiful, either. More like _not_ ugly.

Zuko draped his arms around her tightly-and across the room, through the doorway, a nervous servant peeked his head through the doorway. He sputtered. He gathered his bearings and flew away again.

Zuko didn't notice though, and Mai decided that if it wasn't one thing, then it was _definitely_ another. Regardless, he stayed safely on the ground.

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	5. divine

**C A T H A R S I S**

a world can't rebuild itself after all.

{maiko}

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><p><strong>an: **i'm sort of high on writing these things at the moment. i'll probably bottom out eventually, but 'tis nice to enjoy things while they last.

**drabble title: **divine

**word count: **736

**pairing: **MaiZuko

**prompt: "j**ames believed he was given the monarchy by God's will. people hated him. the dominion failed. he was chased out of the england."

**disclaimer: **not now. probably never.

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><p><strong><em>divine<em>**

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They were decent leaders, Zuko and Mai. They didn't strike fear into the hearts of their subjects—rather, preached all the right things. They called for rectification, unity, the empowerment of citizens. They were pioneers—given the divine right to rule and to have everything, and they outright rejected it, instead giving power away by the bucket full to commoners and lords alike.

"_Anorexic leadership_," sneered the nobles, with their noses sharply upturned and wrinkled as though they'd smelled something awful.

But who cared? Mai didn't, and Zuko didn't because Mai taught him apathy.

As was the Fire Nation tradition—and infamy—many risks were taken by dissenters on the royalty's lives. The pair had seen many assassins in their day, and Mai was unimpressed with each and every one of them, convinced that the last was more pathetic than the first. This became a cycle. Zuko would take a stance, real fear coursing through him like he'd jumped into a vat of ice and death, and everything became sudden _real_. At the same time, Mai stood there, with an expression of complete and utter boredom.

And so it came to pass that the casual, for-hire assassins thought Zuko and Mai invincible. Maybe Agni Himself had given them the power, and that it was His will that they should never be stripped of it. Maybe it was meant to be.

And it's not like they could go against Him or His choices.

One assassin found the couple in their bedroom, sneaking in through an unlocked window. It was a happy coincidence really—a guard had dozed off, stationed outside their grand chamber door. The man, coated with umbrage, was able to find his way around without trouble, sneaking on bare feet and hiding around corners.

When Zuko and Mai brought themselves away and decided to call it a night, Zuko closed the ornate door behind them obliviously. Sleep-deprived, his eyelids drooped, dark and bleary. He collapsed onto the bed.

Mai, however, froze. Something wasn't right.

Her acute senses were unimpaired. With a clatter, mere seconds later, a poison dart came whizzing past her ear. She pulled a secret knife from her hair and spun around, crouched in the deadliest stance she could muster. Zuko jumped from the bedspread with a puff of smoke, jolted, quaking in his boots.

Mai cut the man down and pinned him to the wall. He was helpless against her quick reflexes and lethal aim. She folded her arms across her chest and forced an unhappy stare across her face.

Zuko, on the verge of panic, exclaimed, "What the _hell_?"

Mai thought that pretty much summed up this encounter. She made a mental note to reprimand the palace guard staff. Whoever was the idiot that let this killer in was…well, an idiot.

Then again, he made her night far more exciting.

The assassin dared gape at both of them directly in the eyes, a thin cut across his cheek dripping scarlet blood across the stone floor.

Mai demanded the room not be carpeted when she acquired the throne and all its entitlements. She liked the frozen texture on her thin soled shoes—and the effect was unexpected, not too dissimilar from black ice. Now she rolled her eyes.

"I hope you know you're fated to die," she murmured, looking at the man with pungent apathy in her soul, painted across her features.

He didn't twitch.

Mai shrugged. Zuko burned on.

Zuko wanted to kill the man, but Mai said, "Don't bother. He'll suffer a worse fate when they torture answers from him."

Resigned, Zuko nodded. Punishments should fit their crimes. A flash of fear sloshed through the assassins eyes.

Mai said, "It's been a strange night."

The assassin was hauled away, kicking and screaming. His defiance fallen through. He thought himself sane and the Fire Lady bat-shit insane. She didn't disagree.

Zuko's eyes were blurry. The dark circles were so extreme that they made his nose look broken and swollen.

Mai wrenched her knifes from the wall, noting the material covering the floor. It would have to be fixed first thing in the quickly-approaching morning.

Zuko fell with the moon, collapsing once more onto the elaborate sheets of their bed.

Mai lay awake for the carcass of the night, contemplating but never vocalizing. For a while, light streamed in through the still-open window, and she had no inkling of where it hailed.

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	6. valley deep

**C A T H A R S I S**

a world can't rebuild itself after all.

{maiko}

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><p><strong>an: **because watching people die is apparently romantic. i think i've been too into european history at the moment. everything weird suddenly seems normal. huh.

**drabble title: **valley deep

**word count: **446

**pairing: **MaiZuko

**prompt: "**dissent eradicated like clockwork."

**disclaimer: **you know how it is.

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><p><strong><em>valley deep<em>**

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From across a valley, Mai and Zuko watched as men willingly sold their souls for "freedom."

"And history books will regard them as martyrs," Mai scoffed. She stood on the top of a hill with an upturned nose, the height of nobility. Her shiny hair cascaded down her shoulders like the picturesque goddess she was, adorned in silk and gold. The sunshine did not flatter her pale skin though—rather, gave her the sickly hue of an oxygen-deprived newborn.

"History is all opinions," Zuko said, wrapping an arm around her waist. His spirit grew that day—from hesitant to omniscient; he reached for the skies, wanting to ascend at last. But not like a phoenix; that would make the poorest of analogies.

Mai dismissed the issue with a wave of her unblemished, half-gloved fingers. "They're all idiots, fighting for nothing. We can crush them."

The Imperial Army stood majestically, on komodo-rhino back or on foot, benders rocked into stances, and the armed poised to attack. They harbored no hopes, dreams, or fears. They knew their job, and they knew it well. Strategy was branded on their brains. They did not accept defeat.

And Zuko and Mai stood and watched as the Independence Movement was squashed into little more than a scattering of fleas. Ash coated the valley then, like new snowfall. The smell of burning stung neighboring nostrils. In the Palace City across the way, the people shut their blinds with force.

"Infamy," Zuko said simply to Mai. The battle was ended before it begun. Rebellion never stood a chance, like blood against arsenic. The Fire Nation royalty just could not be extinguished; a spark fire, they grew at contact with air and water and weakness.

Mai nodded. "This will not look good for us. I expect a second rebellion movement to begin no later than tomorrow."

"Would you like to bet on it?" Zuko joked.

"You can't bet on the inevitable," she said humorlessly.

He sagged, pulled her closer. The smoke was getting thicker. Wildfire spread. Zuko made note to order Restoration Effort to reverse damages. "Our time isn't up yet. Agni has faith."

"So it would appear."

"That's good enough for me." He nuzzled into her hair, so ignorant of the contrast between public displays of affection on the summit, and charred corpses in a sort of death valley. Even spirits pretended to overlook an easy mistake.

She kissed him on the cheek and pulled away. "Pray for misguided souls. We can't afford darkness in an era of peace."

She left him for a lonely forest that afternoon, while he still stood atop the damned mountain. Unmovable, invincible, young, and dead-wrong about the world.


	7. hair and heir

**C A T H A R S I S**

a world can't rebuild itself after all.

{maiko}

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><p><strong>an: **i have two words for you: _troll lee_.

**drabble title: **hair and heir

**word count: **211

**pairing: **MaiZuko implied.

**prompt: **none.

**disclaimer: **you know how it is.

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><p><strong><em>hair and heir<em>**

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It was by no means a fluffy romance. That sort of thing would make Mai retch even on a good day. She had no desire for the lame "fairy tale" love that starry-eyed girls always dreamed of, and noble mothers told bed time stories about out of a gold-encrusted book. The minute Mai heard these tales—the stories of liars and blasphemers—she wanted them to never enter her conscience again.

Ty Lee didn't care of course.

"You and Zuko are going to have the most adorable little children!" she gushed, much to Mai's annoyance. "They'll throw little fiery knives, and be all awkward and lanky for a while, and have the prettiest hair and just…aaaaah!"

Ty Lee giggled. Mai scowled.

"I'm not sure that's even a possibility," Mai said. "It's inevitable that I won't like having a squirming bundle of trouble stowed away inside of me only to burst out and cause an undesirable amount of pain."

Ty Lee merely accused Mai of waking up on the wrong side of the bed, and Mai didn't disagree.

"You know what would be even cuter though?"

Mai paused, highly skeptical that she would want to hear _what would be even cuter._

Ty Lee told her anyway.

"_Twins_!"

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	8. alternative

**C A T H A R S I S**

a world can't rebuild itself after all.

{maiko}

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><p><strong>an: **they do have chemistry, but they don't always have to reveal it.

thanks for the reviews, by the way. and for the record, i'm not an emo-goth-whatever. i'm the kind of person who criticizes both emo-goth-whatevers _and _just about everything else. i'm a little bit abrasive at times. ah well. we're not perfect. but i have noted that yes, things_ can_ indeed be depressing, sometimes too much so. based on the fact that these drabbles were inspired by european history, however, i'd say they're a huge step up from the actual events in the happiness department.

**drabble title: **alternatives

**word count: **669

**pairing: **MaiZuko

**prompt: "**era of peace." also, a little bit of scarlet letter.

**disclaimer: **don't own a:tla.

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><p><strong><em>alternatives<em>**

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There was a time of peace—and Mai took full responsibility for it.

What happened was the rebel army came a-knockin' on her door one day. They informed her of a list of rights and grievances that they, as Fire Nation citizens, deserved. They claimed government should cater to the needs of the people it serves, taking away only necessary liberties for their protection and for the order and prosperity of a nation. They announced that they wanted free speech, trial by jury, consent to taxation, among other things. They said they wanted a handwritten constitution, and no more law-enforcing scum patrolling their streets afterhours and weeding away the rowdiest drunks and outspoken political opponents.

To all of this—what Ozai would have referred to as _nonsense_—Mai said, "Whatever."

The citizens all took it as a yes, so they began to form their own local governments, and there was little conflict.

Iroh had to shake Mai's hand for this, smiling, old man that he was. Mai did not think him wise, but she appreciated his tea-making abilities. Sometimes, she wished he came with a mute button, but such luxuries weren't even offered to the divinest of rulers. So is the way of things. All life is suffering; the Avatar liked to spout off his Buddhist aphorisms.

Iroh then left to return to Ba Sing Se, and it was weird. Mai and Zuko very nearly had the palace to themselves, save for the servants, Lo and Li, and a few other political officials. No sister, no Ty Lee, no Avatar; Tom-Tom was with his parents for the weekend.

That day, Zuko straightened the crown that marred his otherwise symmetrical topknot. He called for Mai, and she was only seconds away in an adjacent room, leisurely tossing stiletto knives into the stone wall. There was an "X" painted in the middle. She hardly ever missed her mark, and on the floor was scattered many of the knives that lost their stony grip.

Mai emerged from the room, turning over a dagger in her hands. "Hm?"

Zuko freed his hands from his sleeves. "We have nothing to worry about. Isn't it weird?"

"I suppose," Mai replied. "I thought this morning's headache wasn't as severe as it normally is. Also, the fact that Ty Lee didn't launch herself into our bed chambers as a sort of wakeup call was a plus."

Zuko grinned. "I had a full six hours of sleep. That rarely happens."

Mai didn't sleep, but she said nothing on the subject—instead, drawing herself up the full height and making her way towards the court room. "You know, things aren't so bad here."

"Yeah?" He was pleasantly surprised; her tone gushed slightly of optimism. It was too bad he couldn't mark that down for forever memory.

"Seeing it empty… Everything could be worse. It could be actually empty."

Zuko nodded solemnly. He wandered over to her before she could sit and rest on her throne. The walls surrounding were reeking of fire. The light wasn't flattering, rather, made them look eerie, like strangers to one another.

He took her hand, and he noticed how cold it was.

"It could be better, too," she said. "By all means, it should be better."

"We're not _gifted_ leaders," Zuko admitted.

She stared at him. "Of course not. There are no perfect leaders. But it's better you than…"

"Ozai? _Azula_?"

"No. Someone who doesn't want the throne but must take it anyway, to avoid a worse alternative. They turn out to be the worst leaders of all, or so I've been told."

"Like Uncle?"

She wasn't here to insult. "Like the ones who were forced."

A pause.

"What does that make me then?" Zuko asked, curiously, meeting her eyes with a flicker of gold.

"_Strange_."

And Zuko laughed, squeezed her cold hand, and they sat together like the world's strangers, letting rays of sunlight bypass their faces.

.


End file.
